getting ready to leave for florida/bahamas!

My tooth infection was drained the last time I went to the dentist, and temporarily filled. The temporary filling proved just that, and has been missing for a few days now. I can't stop playing with it, making little sucking noises on the the hollowed-out-tooth. I am sure everyone around me is tremendously grateful, but every *once* in a while, it hurts in a weird hollow-achy-echoing sort of way, and so I keep messing with it...not that I want to hurt, but I have to keep testing it. Stupid intermittent reinforcement.

Anyways, I decided not to even call the dentist until I get back from my trip, because it's bearable now. I just don't eat on that side. My trip! My trip! I am leaving bright and early early early on Saturday morning! My mom is dropping me off at the office at 6:30am, where I commence Being In Charge of 40 people - 32 of whom have developmental disabilities. We fly to Orlando, stay at the Caribbean Beach Resort, go to Disney's Magic Kingdom for 5 days, then board a cruise ship and head out to the islands of Nassau and Castaway Cay - where I will be swimming with dolphins, para-sailing, and peering through glass bottom boats. We fly back on November 8th.

I am not quite comprehending that we are leaving the day after tomorrow. I'm still a little dazed. All organized - mostly - but disbelieving.

Today's so-strong-it-almost-knocked-me-over realization was how much I was going to miss Adam and my puppy dog. I had a fantastic morning with Adam today - it's nice when he doesn't have to work super early AND he wakes up while I'm still home. Last night I stayed up past my bedtime watching the movie Defiance - Adam begggged to put it on, and then fell asleep before the plot twisted even a little bit. It is not the type of movie I would normally choose for myself - I have a hard time watching anything emotional - rather, I have a hard time *choosing* to watch anything that makes me feel beyond light and fluffy. I am emotional enough - when I watch movies, I want to relax, not cry. However - I am usually *glad* when I watch emotionally-deep movies, because, let's face it, they're better quality than Dude, Where's My car? So anyways - I stayed up really, really late watching a lot of Jewish people die horrific deaths.

Anyways. Adam. Juno. My beautiful beautiful puppy dog and my amazing amazing man. Many mornings when I wake up, Adam and Juno are both still sleeping - Juno usually wakes up but doesn't move much - just follows me with brown eyes while I'm getting ready. Adam looks so good in our green sheets and blankets - secretly one of the reasons I picked out that color. I have a very hard time leaving the dogs and boy in the morning - when it's cold out and there is this wonderful October sunshine and I just want to stay in bed, one hand petting Juno, watching Adam's freakishly long eyelashes.

Too mushy for you? Sorry. I am all mush today. I am currently impressed with his ability and desire to always *improve* himself. The two of us being who we are butt heads in certain areas pretty damn frequently, but all the upset is worth it when I tell him something is important to me and I can SEE the work and effort he has put into understanding my needs more. It's an amazing feeling. I am feeling so lucky.

He won't be home when I get home tonight - so I am going to stop at the gym first with Tulip - I am going to walk for 5 minutes on the treadmill, run for 12, walk for 5 more, then do 38 minutes on the bike. That will cover what I was supposed to do yesterday, and what I am supposed to do today, with a few minutes extra to count towards my goal of 500 fitness minutes this month. I currently am at 365 minutes....so add up that, and I will need to do 75 minutes tomorrow to hit my goal!!!!

After the gym, I'll go home and put two butternut squash in the oven, and cook the lentils I bought today - I splurged on red AND green lentils, just to make a prettier plate. I have tracked my food fantastically well for the last week - and hope the scale will show it tomorrow at my weight watchers meeting. Even if it doesn't - because I seem to have a 1 week lag reaction time - I'll feel good about knowing I did it for a whole week. I plan on continuing it on my trip - I will be taking ww oatmeal and a bunch of fruit and other food with me to avoid crap.

I also want to take Juno for a walk tonight, and continue the packing process. I miss Adam already. My pirate costume is fantastic. Yay thriftstores.

I think that is all for now. I am all sorts of mixed feelings right now!